my greatest fear

is succinctly expressed by Shari Goldhagen's "Family and Other Accidents" and this has something to do with INFIDELITY.

"This [INFIDELITY] always happens; you just thought you were special and it wouldn't happen to you."

i was left heartbroken by the book because the two brothers who are the lead characters in the book happened to be married with family and then had illicit affairs and then got back with their original wives. the older brother could only describe family as something "fluid" - his line goes "Everything is just so fucking fluid, you know?"

i am praying hard that when something like this happens to me, that i would know what to do and not just meltdown like butter in a hot pan.

anyhow, just struck by how the author captured my fear in a sentence.